Every advice that makes the speaker sound smart is not only awesome, but it's practical too. Here's a real-life example from silky-voiced Mike Rowe of Dirty Jobs.

The question to Mr. Rowe was, "What is your job advice to people who are trying to find work?"

First, here's his full answer. Following that is his answer in stages, with replies from someone who's not trying to suck his own dick. At least in public, anyway.

Q: What are your favorite books?

A: I've only read 3.

Superfudge, by Judy Bloom, which was delightful;

Shunga is the Japanese term for a particular genre of ukiyo-e ("pictures of the floating world") in which humor and sexual explicitness coexist in skillfully rendered images.

The word itself (春画) is made up of the kanji characters for 'spring' & 'picture,' with spring being a common euphemism for sex.

Born out of playful competition between renowned Japanese painters such as Utamaro, Harunobu, and Hokusai, the art form, which enjoyed immense popularity

Japanese artist Yoko Ono (1933 – not dead yet) has not only been a pioneer of conceptual art since the 1960s but is also infinitely famous for such accomplishments as marrying John Lennon and destroying The Beatles. Despite this, prior to last weekend, I had never actually seen an exhibition featuring her work. So it was with great fascination and excitement that I went to the Museum of Contemporary Art Tokyo on the opening day of Yoko Ono: From My Window to feast on an eclectic collection spanning her lifetime.

In the bottom of the 5th inning of last night's playoff game between the Yakult Swallows and Yomiuri Giants, the Swallows manager pinch hit for the starting pitcher, who had just given up a two-run home run in the top of the 5th allowing the Giants to take a 2-1 lead.

"It's too early to pull him," I said to my buddy and fellow Swallows fan, Bowen Roozewell, who nodded in agreement.

Tokyo, Sept. 2015

This is Kazuhiro Hatakeyama, the current first baseman/power slugger of the Tokyo Yakult Swallows.

There are a lot of awesome things in Japan as well as a lot of retarded things. Here are a couple examples of the retarded.

1) Ask your man if he thinks your outfit is cute
And not just when you’re putting it on in front of the mirror. Do this over and over all day long. At least four or five times per outfit.

2) Ask questions that you already know the answer to
For instance, when you show up at your boyfriend’s place and find him eating McDonald’s ask, “Are you eating McDonald’s?” Or when he buys a pack of cigarettes and takes out a smoke, say, “Are you gonna smoke?” Or when you wake him up off of

1) Category 1 Jamas – Bottleneckers
There are 13.35 million people living in Tokyo. Yet somehow these mouthbreathers think that they’re the only ones. They get on a train and then stop. Somehow it doesn’t occur to them that they might not be the only ones trying to get on the train in The City of People Being Pushed Onto Trains by Railway Employees Because the Trains Are So Fucking Crowded.

1) Hilarious English on T-Shirt Guy
You know what sucks about Japan? The more time goes by, the less T-shirts I see around here with bizarre and/or inappropriate English on them. Back in the day, there were all kinds. You used to see family men playing in the park with their kids sporting a shirt saying “Alcoholic” or an old man on the train wearing one saying “I feel happiness when I eat a nose rice” or stroll by an elementary school and see kids with shirts saying “wishes do girls,” “try my delicious salt